Paean To The Mountains

[ Paean noun: a song of praise or triumph. ]

I write for all kinds of reasons.  One of the big ones is: Writing about something lets me know how I feel about it; and why.

A few weeks ago I took a one thousand mile road-trip around the far north coastline of the Highlands.  I rested.  I spent time.  I did Things.

I climbed some mountains.

I wrote this post to find out why.

The mountains of Scotland are the highest hills in the U.K.  Angry fists of granite and quartz punching their way heavenward from the molten bedrock of the earth’s strata; each one a unique glacial scream, frozen in time.  In relative terms they are infants, dwarfed by the incontestable might of the Himalaya but, when contrasted with the artificially flat ribbons of our electric grey city streets, they are towering and fearsome gods, capable of a retribution both swift and eager on the unwary and unprepared.  Up here the climbing is beautiful, but the conditions are ever-changing, sneaky, and capricious.  Make no mistake, people die on these hills.

We were nearing the top of Ben Hope.  We had long ago crossed the snowline and were now forced to kick holes in two foot deep powder in order to make progress.  We knew we were close to the summit but fog had descended curtailing visibility to less than 10 feet.  Our map told us that just to our left lay a sheer edge, a vertical stone wall dropping away into a black abyss of nothing onto which snow had frozen and refrozen forming a shelf of indeterminate width.  Best not get too close to that edge.  Best not test its boundaries lest it suddenly free itself to champ it’s eager waiting maw around our broken bodies…

It is laughably easy to lie to yourself during peacetime.  Blanketed in soft stationary comfort and easy pleasure.  It becomes a lot harder when you are forced deep into the trenches of war, or when you find yourself in the cold, hard, and unforgiving places of the world.  When you are forced by circumstance to gulp down shot after bitter shot of gut-check reality espresso.  Sometimes you will surprise yourself, especially if your preparation has been good.  Othertimes you will realise that: all your talk has been naught but the parroting of an elaborate fiction.  A fragile tower, spun of sugar and built on sand in monsoon-storm country.

It had been snowing heavily for the last forty minutes.  We moved forward, crunching step after step into the whispering blanket of whiteness, and did our best to peer thru the murk.  The sky, the mist, and the snow-covered ground were all the same colour.  There were no features, nothing we could use to get our bearings.  You couldn’t tell which way was up or down.  The wind howled and bit at us but all other sound was dampened.  We started to see figures in the mist that vanished as we approached them.  I had long ceased to be able to feel my fingers and my phone, which I had been using as a camera, had now frozen solid.

What is there of great worth in life that carries no risk in its gaining?  I would say: Nothing worth having.  To endlessly seek to protect yourself by: shying away, building higher walls, and fitting better locks is not living, it is merely surviving.  An approach to life spawned and gifted as the final remit of prisons, death camps, and every other dark place built, cordoned, and maintained by fear.

We knew we were close but visibility was virtually non-existent now.  We were two blindfolded children, surrounded and held close by a sub zero desert of dirty white with only a compass and our reckoning to keep us true.  We called to each other over the wind, our sentences terse and expedient, focused solely on the situation at hand.  Should we call it?  Should we descend and come back another day?  Or should we push on?  As we inched like snails ever upward, the temperature continued to fall…

Sometimes in order to progress we must put ourselves at risk in some way, be it: physically, mentally, or emotionally.  Sometimes, in order to truly live, we need to throw ourselves wide open to the world and engage with it in a deeper, more visceral sense than we are used to.  When the mask begins to crack and the armour sloughs away; when the light is stark-white-bright and the mirror unavoidable; when there are no excuses left, and nowhere left to run, there is hope; and the opportunity for real growth.  These moments may be painful, they may be hard, they may hurt like hell and burn like the moan of a lost and aching thunder, but that does not render them unnecessary.

All at once I caught sight of the summit stone, just a little way off to our right.  We whooped and hollered and ran, joyous and stumbling to it as fast as the deep powder would allow.  We each touched the rough block of ice-covered stone once, then turned in unspoken agreement and immediately began retracing our footsteps.  The way down would be hard, and dalliance would only bring greater punishment.

The mountains and the journey of climbing are a living metaphor for me.  A testing ground.  They allow me to confront weaknesses in my game and character that are not readily available or apparent at ground level.  They reveal me to myself.  This type of insight is vital beyond price, yet cannot be purchased at a store, ordered online, or won in a lottery.  It must be earned.

As above, so below.  As on the mountain, so it is in life.

And that, is why.


Did you know I have a mailing list?  It’s a community of people who get to hear my new music first, stay in touch a little more directly, and receive sporadic gifts once in a while.  I send an exclusive newsletter out every now and then, and you get 3 free pieces of music when you sign up.  If you’re interested, you can try it by clicking the button below.  Thanks.

Join the community


Thanks for reading this – I’d love to hear your thoughts.  The comments box is just below.

319 Replies to “Paean To The Mountains”

  1. What do you know of darkness?
    I’ve been to the edge, looked down into the abyss
    And it called to me
    Jump let me take away the pain
    But it was a lie
    An illusion
    So I filled it with light and love and happiness instead
    And emerged a phoenix from the fire

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Wow…you are an amazing writer. I love your use of similes and metaphors. Ok now I sound like a geek😜 Can’t help it, I was an English Literature major and a teacher for 20 years. How long did this journey take?
    I can imagine the internal rewards you must feel. You are reaching heights literally and figuratively. The cold weather sounds like it was fierce. I’m just starting to get into hiking locally. Any tips would be greatly appreciated 😊

    Like

    1. Thankyou so much – you are very kind.
      I am a total geek, so: Welcome 😉
      The climb was part of a 14 day journey in the highlands, but the actual climb itself took maybe 5 hours (we went absolutely as fast as we could to avoid potential frostbite etc). The weather was fierce indeed.
      My main tip would be to take less than you think you need – it is amazing how much stuff people take that they never use, and I feel it’s good to learn that you can go without most things (apart from water).
      If you have any specific questions tho, send them thru and I’ll do my best to answer them.
      Be well,
      – J

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Angry fists of granite and quartz punching their way heavenward from the molten bedrock of the earth’s strata; each one a unique glacial scream, frozen in time. The poetic resonances of these words are simply marvelous. The reader thrilled to enjoy an aesthetic experience.

    Like

  4. Angry fists of granite and quartz punching their way heavenward from the molten bedrock of the earth’s strata; each one a unique glacial scream, frozen in time. The poetic resonances of these words are simply marvelous. The reader thrilled to enjoy an aesthetic experience.

    Like

  5. Brilliant! I loved every word! I just got back from a three week trip. We did a lot of hiking and I loved every second of the time that I had away from my ordinary everyday life. Physically, I felt great on my trip, but now that I am back, my pain is starting to return. I don’t stay active enough when I am at home. I am truly my happiest when I am immersed in nature. Thank you for sharing your story. It was truly inspirational!

    Like

    1. Many different ways, it depends on the climb.
      On the physical side – I train quite a lot generally, and as for nutrition, that day I was mostly fasting as I climbed, broken with the occasional handful of almonds, mouthful of water, or slice of beef jerky.
      Hope that helps.

      Like

  6. came here to thank you for ‘liking’ my post but stayed for the imagery of your words. Have never been to Scotland, but was captivated by the splendor of the Powell & Pressburger (sp?) ‘I Know Where I’m Going’. Although filmed in black and white, it gives some idea of that magnificent part of the world – not just the mountains but the whirlpool of Corryvreckan.

    Like

  7. Absolutely breathtaking, James. From your word choice (“paean” is a favorite of mine) to your illustrative descriptions of the merciless Scotland mountains. I’m still deeply captivated!

    Also, rest assured, I will be listening to your ambient music right away. Have you heard of or happen to draw inspiration from bands like Hammock and Brian Eno? They are my absolute favorites.

    Like

    1. Hey there,
      I’ve just seen this now – apologies for my tardy response!
      Thankyou very much for your kind words, I am really glad that you like the post – it seems to have gone over well.
      I have not heard either of the bands (tho I have heard of Brian Eno) but may check them out when I get the time.
      Let me know what you think of it – I’d be curious for sure, and
      Have a great day,
      – J

      Like

Click Here To Comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s